As Veterans Day draws closer each year, I start to reminisce about my experiences in the United States Army a little bit more than on average. Depending on your source for research, the ratio for overcoming a negative interaction is 3:1, 5:1, or even as much as 10:1! Ten positive affirmations to overcome one negative interaction!
I can’t argue with that research, because do I think of the awards, promotions, the well-dones? No, I think of a time when I was assigned to a work detail in Saudi Arabia and of course it was hurry up and wait. As I waited, I was talking with “the guys.” I was sharing about my husband also being somewhere unknown in the desert too. I took the photo of us from my wallet and showed it to them. One man asked, “Who is that with him?” I said, “That’s me!” He replied skeptically, “What the hell happened to you?”
Well, buddy let me tell ya….
The obvious response would have been, “Listen, Dude, you’ve been deployed to the desert, same as me for months now without a hot shower and trust me you aren’t looking all that hot in your kevlar helmet and flak vest either!” Sure, I told myself I certainly wasn’t sporting photo make-up and let’s not forget to mention the Army issued glasses that were very much like those thick unbreakable glasses my mom got me in the 4th grade! Still, his words cut deep into a wound that it would seem has been open for most of my life.
Insecure from an early age and prone to compare myself with others, I was very self conscious about the moles on my face. Beauty marks my mom would say, but I disagreed. My insecurities were magnified by the divorce of my parents and then middle school years are hard for everyone. I remember having to walk down the hallway past a class full of high school boys that would wait and heckle us as we traversed the “gauntlet” just to get to our lockers. They had a way of pointing out physical flaws that most of the time I didn’t even know what they meant and was way too embarrassed to ask anyone. Time has a way of educating us on those topics.
In high school and college, I struggled to find identity in places where it wouldn’t be found. I tried to find it in self deprecating humor, the bottle, and dangerous behaviors. It's so sad to me that all that time my identity was secure and waiting for me to claim. Even though I attended church and was confirmed - it was as though the promises the Bible held were for the good people not the ugly sinners like me. Could God actually love me if I wasn’t beautiful and certainly didn’t have it all together?
I remember walking to church on a Sunday morning after a stereotypical college Saturday night, beating myself up and half thinking I would burst into flames upon entering the church doors. Still, I was drawn to go because my heart knew there was a truth. A truth that all these years later I still fight myself to claim because the evil one knows exactly where that weak spot in my armor is. With practice and God’s persistence, I am ready to say, “I am beautiful in the eyes of the Lord and that is all that matters!” My extra pounds aren’t going to magically fall from my body overnight and the wrinkles and gray hair will keep coming, but that's ok, because I truly know that I am the M.E. - the Mary Elizabeth that God loved so much that he created me to be here today right now.
Psalm 34:5 affirms me by saying, “Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.” On my bathroom mirror I wrote, “Be the person GOD sees!!” It appears most clearly with the steam of a shower when I stand figuratively and literally in the vulnerable nakedness of life. It solidifies my life goal of Galatians 1:10, “Does this sound as if I am trying to win human approval? No indeed! What I want is God's approval! Am I trying to be popular with people? If I were still trying to do so, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
My favorite picture of me is the one I refer to as Dandelion Girl. In my mind's eye, this is me. In reality, I was happily picking dandelions with no care in the world but to live in the moment with Dad and present him with my gift when he took the photo. Matthew 18:3 says, “I assure you that unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the Kingdom of heaven.” My soul is Dandelion Girl and she dances with abandon in praise and worship before the Lord with no thought other than to be in the moment and please Him!
If you have ever fought a negative assault or negative notions about yourself, I am leaving you with 10 positive Godly affirmations to wipe out the earthly negative.
1) Genesis 1:27 - So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
2) Psalm 139:14 - I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
3) Luke 12:7 - Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
4) Ephesians 2:10 - For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
5) 1 Samuel 16:7 - But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”
6) Ecclesiastes 3:11 - He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
7) Proverbs 31:30 - Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
8) Proverbs 3:15 - She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her.
9) Song of Solomon 4:1 - Behold, you are beautiful, my love. Behold, you are beautiful.
and my favorite!
10) Romans 8: 38-39 - For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
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